I feel like I am holding onto too much right now. Keeping too many secrets, and staying asleep too much. My dreams have been a total madhouse. Tonight I had to find myself on a tiny two lane highway. As long as I can remember, the only real sanctuary I have found is experienced behind the wheel of an moving automobile. In the past I have lied, and said that found it in the arms of a lover, or that i found it to occur while writing, but the gig is up…. sanctuary is being a moving target.
You have to have just the right music, ideally the windows are open and it is after midnight. I form my route via a system based on road condition, intuition, speed limits, proximity to water, probability of speed traps, level of “nowhere”-ness required, and air quality. There is a level of peace that you reach when you are hurtling through space at certain speeds. Ultimately you want to go somewhere with loads of trees and a likelihood that you will not see another soul on the road. Every now and again you find that you can do it with someone else there, but they are usually those types of folk that you can be around and feel alone (which if I have ever said this to you, it is a HUGE compliment)
Whatever has been sitting on your shoulders falls away under the influence of the covenant between you and the momentum that you are traveling with. Some people have religious experiences at church, I have them when I am operating a 3,000 lb. machine. The night streets are my cathedral.